Husbands and the Bride of Christ

Text: Ephesians 5:25-26 and Matthew 22:1-15

After addressing wives in verses 22 through 24, Paul switches focus to husbands has some wise words for them. A husband is to earn the respect of his wife, by loving her, as Christ loved the church. That prompts us to ask how OUR love for our wives can be Christlike love.

1 Christ’s Love is Paschal Love. V25 

We shall come back to this, but briefly at this stage let us note that husbands are to earn the respect of their wives (and their children) by loving their wife as Christ loved the church. 

• Christ loved us (the church – his people) when we were unlovable. Romans 5:7-8  Apply that to your marriage! We can all be hard to live with, for we are far from perfect. At times we can even be unlovable. Even at times like that we are to love one another.
• Christ’s love for the church is forgiving love. With obvious ramifications for our marriage relationships!
• Christ’s love for the church, his bride, was entirely self sacrificial. He ‘GAVE HIMSELF’ for his bride. It was sacrificial, even unto death!Ask yourself, “Would I have sacrifice myself for my wife?” That’s what Jesus did for his church – when we were in mortal danger, he sacrificed himself – he GAVE himself, willingly, as a gift, a costly gift so that we who deserve eternal death could have eternal life. That is how a Christian husband must love his wife.

We will see more about this in a later study.

2 Christ’s Love is Pastoral Love. V26

Let’s take a moment to learn what was involved in a wedding, in ancient Israel. In Israel, the marriage process had four steps.

• The betrothal. The parents would select a suitable match. Once the legal niceties had all been wrapped up, an agreed contract was signed. It was much more formal than our modern engagements, legally the couple were now actually married.
• The interval of preparation. The groom has to pay a dowry to the bride’s family, and this will be done and a period of ‘marriage preparation’ will begin. The purpose of this interval, was to give the bride time to prepare for the bridegroom’s return to receive her.
• The procession. The preparation is over. The bride is ready, she is robed in her wedding garment, and awaiting his arrival. On the appointed day, the groom, now also dressed in his wedding garments, leaves his home and with his friends they march in a procession, carrying torches and singing, until they reach the home of the bride. When they arrive, the bridegroom sweeps the bride up, and conveys her to the wedding venue! 
• The wedding feast. Now at the venue, a great feast is spread, – the wedding celebrations go on for a week or maybe even two!  The guests would be invited and given a wedding robe to wear, and there would be festivities and eating and drinking and dancing. Matthew 22:1-4 

Now, let’s go back to Paul’s analogy: The church is the bride of Christ. The betrothal has been enacted, legally, for we have been chosen Christ from before the foundation of the world, Ephesians 1:3-4  – and the dowry has been paid at the cross, where Christ paid for our redemption with his own blood. 1 Corinthians 6:20  We are now in the period of preparation, – waiting for Christ, the bridegroom to come, and to claim his bride, and as we await his return, we are being prepared to meet him. The marriage feast is ahead of us. Let’s think about that…

• The purpose of preparation to meet the bridegroom. That he might sanctify and cleanse it. Paul says here that Christ is sanctifying his church. The word implies holiness, making us separate unto the Lord, having clothed us in the righteousness of Christ! Giving us spotlessly white robes, fit for the wedding. And He is cleansing his church. Washing us clean, so that every spot and blemish is removed.  Only those who have been so prepared can be admitted to the feast when the bridegroom comes. READ Matthew 22:11-14  
• The process of preparation of the bride. Paul states, with the washing of water by the word, Paul is using symbolic language, painting a word picture. When we get dirty water cleanses us. What can cleanse our souls from residual sin, and prepare us for the return of our bridegroom? It is the WORD! Naturally the word of God – but there is a distinction here. The word used in Greek is not LOGOS, it is RHEMA – not just the word, but the spoken word, the word PREACHED. READ 1 Corinthians 1:17-18  Please don’t underestimate the necessity of hearing the inspired written word of God opened and proclaimed and explained. When the Bible is faithfully preached, the Holy Spirit, applies what is being taught to our hearts, and prepares us to receive the bridegroom when He comes. Titus 3:5 
• The person who acts in preparation. That he might present it to himself In Jewish custom of that time, the bride’s preparation was assisted by her family, – but who can prepare us, the church for the arrival of the bridegroom but Christ our saviour? We could never make ourselves pure enough to be worthy of our beloved! So Paul tells us that in our case, the bridegroom himself is preparing the bride. On the day when the Lord returns for his bride, it is he who will present his her to HIMSELF. 
• The pinnacle of the preparation. Earthly life has reached its end, or the Lord has returned for us, and we are ready! not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. The next stage, as our period of preparation reaches its culmination, is the great feast, – the marriage supper, a wonderful reunion and glorious welcome into his presence with rejoicing and feasting and eternal blessedness. Revelation 19:9-10  

Our love is to be like that! A husband is to be the head of the wife – to be a pastor to her, to make sure that both he and her are spiritually prepared to meet the Lord in glory. 

So, what we are learning here, is that Christ loves his bride – loves his bride sacrificially, even unto death, he has betrothed her unto himself, and that he ministers to his bride, he pastors her, preparing her for glory, for heaven, washing her with the applied word of God, so that when that great procession day comes and the trumpet sounds and  he returns for her,  she will be a prepared bride ready for eternal life with him.  And Paul then drives the point home for you and me in V28

That love will be both self-sacrificial and pastoral, and as such it will earn the respect and love of the wife, and somehow mirror the divine order of headship that pertains in God’s perfect kingdom.

© Bob McEvoy June 2024